Thanks Gran.....

Yesterday my mind was roaming back to when I was just a little girl and my relationship with my grandfather.  I called him "Gran".  I was sitting outside on a bench under the trees on my lunch break.  There was a nice breeze hitting my face and I don't know why, but I was reliving the few years I was with him and the relationship we had.  It was the most wonderful time and I was feeling the happiness I felt when he sat me on his lap and spoke to me.  I could once again feel the love he had for me, and I for him.  He would talk to me or sing to me from outside my window at night when I was in bed.  He lived next door.  Every evening when he arrived home from work he would call me.  He'd yell "Cookie I'm home", and I would go running to his open arms.  He let me put shaving cream on his face and shave him, without the razor of couse.  I painted his fingernails.  I'd sit one his lap at the dinner table and he'd feed me cornbread he had dunked in milk.  

He was a wonderful, loving, family man who left me when I was very young.  But what he left me with was a feeling that I cannot explain.  I still carry a little leather change purse he gave me when I was 5 years old, with me at all times.  He showed me love, a passion for life and the desire to be good.  One thing I know for sure,  is that he has always been with me, watching over me and making sure I am alright.  He's in my soul.  I loved that man with all of my heart, and I always will.  

I Wish You Love Like My Gran Gave To Me,

Cookie

Feed the Good Wolf.....

I awoke startled as I do most every morning.  Wondering if I did the right thing.  Looking back, regretting, wanting to cry my eyes out.  One thing is for sure.  I don't have any tears left.  They are all dried up.  I don't even have the energy to cry.  I hardly have the energy to do anything. So I roll out of bed.  I look at myself in the mirror.  I see a face  that I don't recognize.  It is a mask I order to say nothing about the fragile feelings hiding in my soul.    And I tell that face that you have to keep going no matter what.  You are on your own now.

Soooo..... I look into the mirror and I stand taller, shoulders back, and take another look at my face again.  I see all that I am.  I see what I have done in my life, what I have learned.  I know what I can do and I know what I will not do. I know who the people are around me and what I can expect from them.  I can see if they are real or not.  If they are compassionate I can feel it.  If they do not have compassion I can feel that too.

So when I wake,  yes, I may have these thoughts that pass through my mind, that do not make me feel good.  But,  they pass quickly and I think of how I got where I am today and what I have to look forward to, and I feel better. I know in time this waking up startled will eventually go away, and I will wake happy. I realize that now it's all about the challenges I face and how strong I must be to face them.   I remind my self to give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way to me.

It's life and I must be strong and have courage to face whatever comes my way.  And I will continue to love and feel love, to laugh and feel happiness, to live and be true to myself and others.  I will feed the good wolf.

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Cherokee Wisdom

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.

 He said, "My son, the battle is between two "wolves" inside us all.

One is Evil - It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. 

The other is Good - It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."

 The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather:

 "Which wolf wins?" 

The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

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I Wish You Love,

Joyce

P.S.  I hope you feed the good wolf too.

Understanding.....

     I don't understand a lot of things and I know we aren't supposed to understand everything in life, but I find myself constantly wanting to.  As if I found the answer it would make me feel better, most likely it wouldn't.   Why this, why that, we as human always want the answers.  Well, it's not always that simple, and may be very complicated.   I guess some things should be left alone, we are not supposed to understand everything, or know the "why" of it all.   It takes a while for me to get to that point of just forgetting about it, and reminding myself that "it is what it is".  Somethings are not ours to understand.  There is not always an answer.  We just have to accept things and go on with our lives. 

I Wish You Love and Understanding,

Joyce

Every morning.....

Every morning when my eyes pop open and I see where I am,  depression tries to take me.  I pull out my sword to fight shoving my sword right through its heart  killing it.  It wants to take me into it's kingdom of pain and sorrow but I will not allow it to.   My armour is thick and will stop it from penetrating my body and my soul.   I still have a passion for life.  I still desire.

Depression will not enter my kingdom.  My kingdom is mine and I will not let you pass through my gates.  I will fight you with cannons and arrows and alligators in the moat.

So keep riding "depression", ride through the forest and do not return.

                                                                                                 ~jz

In case you didn't notice.....

I guess my big cooking days are over, I mean I'm not cooking much lately, so that's why you haven't been seeing many recipe posts from me.  But that's okay with me,  because I did my time. I hope it's okay with you.   And to tell you the truth, I'm kind of over it.  I have been  slaving in the kitchen for most of my life,  and now I'm free!  Well, until I decide I want to cook Veal Parmigiana with Antipasto for a bunch of family and friends.  The best part about that is,  it will be just because I want to! Don't get me wrong, I still love cooking.  But, I'd rather be hanging out at the beach and taking pictures, or writing  poetry and short stories, or posting to my blogs.  I really find it fun and comforting, and I really enjoy it!

So my blog has changed and so has my life, which is a good thing.  My point is, I will be blogging about other things besides just food and recipes, that's what I am trying to say.  I will still be blogging about food and drinks but maybe not as often and just maybe I won't be doing the cooking.  However,  I may partake in some drinking on occasion...lol.  "I like drinking more wine than I used to,  anyway I'm drinking more." (Don Corleone, The Godfather).

Anyway, I hope you are not discouraged from reading my posts.  I do have a new blog called "I Wish You Love" where you will find my photography,  along with my favorite love poems and quotes.  

So, please bear with me as I try different ways to capture your interest.  Thanks for being there,  taking the time to share your lovely comments,  and making my days more pleasurable.  

I Wish You Love,

From just me, 

justjoycee